Happy Birthday

She sat waiting. He's late, as always. Her phone beeped and she read his message. He's coming, he says. She checked the things in front of her. Cupcake, candle and matches to light it with. She smiled as she waited for him. From afar, she could already spot him. Her smile widened as she lit the tiny candle.

He went straight to her side and put his arms around her. He did not even notice the cupcake with the tiny flickering candle that sat in front of her. He kissed her forehead before breaking the hug and as soon as he did, to her great surprise, he kissed her lips softly.

He stared at her as she tried to form coherent words. She couldn't think of anything clever to say, so she pointed at the cupcake and whispered, "Happy Birthday."

He smiled at her, gave her another hug and then blew out the flame. He kept staring at her, that goofy smile she loved still in place.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine." she answered, still avoiding his gaze.

"Why won't you look at me?"

"I am looking at you." she said. And as if to prove her point, she gazed into his eyes. The very eyes that saw her at her worst and still managed to look at her with love.

She loved this boy. She loved his smile. She loved how he made her heart beat fast and slow at the same time. She loved the way it feels to have his hand hold hers. She loved him, and she doesn't even need any reason for feeling that way. She just did.

He sat next to her, his hand clasped around hers. He has this habit of never letting her hand go, not unless she did it first. And even though she would often do this, he'd simply grab her hand once more. Today, however, she didn't let go. She allowed him to keep holding her hand. She loved it when he held her hand.

"So, because it's your birthday, you get three wishes." she said, smiling at him.

"Three wishes? Seriously?" he said, grinning from ear to ear. She merely nodded.

"Well," he started, "for my first wish, you have to get me a turkey!"

"A turkey?" she laughed. "Okay. I'll get you a turkey then."

"My second wish," he said as she flipped her hand over and saw the faint trace of a scar from months ago, "I wish you'd take better care of yourself."

"Your wish is supposed to be for you. Wishing for my well being isn't acceptable!"

"The wish is for me. I need you. So you have to take care of yourself for me."

She smiled at his words. He has this innate ability to make her smile and it's times like this that makes her feel even more thankful to have him in her life.

"Fine. For you, I will." she said, still smiling. "And your last wish?"

"I want you to stay with me for as long as you can. I would have said for all eternity, but I know you don't believe in that. So just stay with me while you can." he said softly, not quite meeting her gaze.

She smiled at him, her heart jumping in her chest as she said, "I already promised you that I will never leave you, I intend to keep that promise. And for you, I'll believe in eternity."

Let me let you go

Lily stood and walked to the door. She looked back at her circle of friends and said, "I'm not drunk. Stop worrying about me.

"Sure. Whatever you say Lily." they said aloud, laughing.

"I'm not drunk. Hey Rayne, come with me to the bathroom will you?" she said as she opened the door. Rayne stood up and followed her. They walked quietly into the hall. A few steps away from the room, Lily's eyes started to water.

"Tell me Rayne, honestly, do you think I'm drunk?" she asked. Her eyes filling with tears.

"Yes Lily. You're drunk. And you shouldn't drink anymore. We never should have asked you to drink." Rayne answered, smiling at her friend as they walked.

"I really love him Rayne." Lily blurted out as she stopped walking. "I love him so much."

"I know." Rayne answered.

"I'm so tired. I don't want this anymore. This is why I don't like drinking. Everytime I drink, the feeling intensifies. It's like I can feel how much I love him even more when there's alcohol in me."

"Alcohol causes your inhibitions to go away. It makes you lose your control."

"I'm so tired. I just want to let him go."

"So why don't you?"

"How am I supposed to do that? How am I supposed to let him go when he's always there. I tried to stay away from him. I really did. But he wouldn't let me let him go. He came here. He went after me. Why does he keep doing this?"

"He doesn't know how yo feel. Why don't you just tell him you need space?"

"Am I supposed to just walk up to him and say 'I love you but I need space'?"

"Why not?"

"He has enough to deal with. I have enough to deal with. I don't want to make more problems for either of us."

"It's not making trouble. It's letting him know how you feel. It would be better if he knew. That way, you can have the space you need to let him go."

"I love him Rayne. I love him so much. I'd do anything for him."

"I know that."

"I want to let him go."

"Then let him go."

"HOW?!"

Rayne put her arms around her whispering words of comfort. She tried to calm Lily down. She wished she could take away Lily's pain. She wished she knew the answer to Lily's question. Not just so she can help Lily, but also so she can let go of the boy she loves as well.

How do you let go of the most important part of you?